Coming Home

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Coming Home

Postby jillw » Sat Oct 27, 2018 2:40 pm

Any criticism other than "Urrrrrrrgh" will be welcome. (See my post on the Presentation/Competition Feedback thread)

Coming Home.jpg
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Re: Coming Home

Postby colinw » Sat Oct 27, 2018 4:02 pm

Love it! Breaks lots of “rules” - which is great. This image depicts seagulls as I always seem to experience them. Keep st it Jill.
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Re: Coming Home

Postby beats » Sat Oct 27, 2018 9:04 pm

Great little story! The guy is clearly returning from a fishing trip and (to my mind) the dog wants him to stop faffing about and hurry up so he can get home for his dinner. The image would stand a little more exposure, but given the dark cloud overhead I think you picked an appropriate overall brightness for the scene.

You've certainly captured a moment in time with the flurry of seagulls bearing testament to that. But there are too many obscuring the narrative (story) aspect of the image for my taste. But if you'd waited a second longer there wouldn't have been any at all which would have diminished the image somewhat. I think they add motion and dynamism to what may have been a relatively static scene.

My main criticism relates to composition. As it stands, nearly everything leads my eyes off the edges of the picture. The bright boat catches the attention (good), you look at the fishing rod, the fisherman, then the dog, then you're off the left edge. There's nothing there to hold the eye so you latch onto the seagulls next. But they are all flying toward and out of the right hand edge, some partially cropped. That and the strong diagonal in the foreground beach drags the eye off the right side in a similar fashion. The clearest seagull (least motion-blurred) unhelpfully obscures the important part of the scene too.

In terms of improvement, I think the composition would be stronger with the fisherman, boat and dog framed over on the right hand side with the birds coming in from the left (before they obscured anything). That way, everything would lead "in" to the picture and keep the eye roving around within it.

All just my opinion and I accept that composition may not have been possible. Hope that critique doesn't make *you* go "uuuuurgh" :)
Knowledge is cheap. Experience isn't.
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Re: Coming Home

Postby Malcolmp » Sun Oct 28, 2018 8:26 am

Hi Jill,
good on ya!
I think Beats is about right with his critique.
It's a good idea for a potentially evocative image (old man and the sea/coming home etc.)but ultimately it fails in its execution both technicaly and creatively.
It's a good exposure given the wide dynamic scene (kudos to you and the camera).
It contains the necessary elements within it to provide a story and appeal just not in a composition that draws one in or arrives anywhere.
Too much depth of field, f11??? the only depth is due to the low ish shutter speed not freezing the birds,of which there are too many and not quite in the right place.
Generally it does not draw me in and hold me.
One has to get past the birds(instead of them providing a clever frame,the barrier that the gravel beach causes, the uniform dof.
If you want to improve this particular image rather than do it again I'd say----
Clone out a few gulls.
Introduce a shallow dof centered on the man in p/p.
Try a black and white conversion.
Try a vignette.
As one of the scoring panel on the night I scored it according to the critique I've just given.
An above average idea and potentially emotive image.
A slightly below average result.
Do it again! I love the premise of the shot and your creative outlook.
Regards
Malc.
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Re: Coming Home

Postby jillw » Sun Oct 28, 2018 11:24 am

Thankyou all - noted and appreciated.
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Re: Coming Home

Postby IanT » Sun Oct 28, 2018 11:26 am

I really felt for you on Thursday! Still, don't take the word of an idiot as important. Now, on that matter .....

A great idea and very nearly pulled off. If you could have arranged the seagulls slightly better by throwing chips into the air in the right places, so as to not obscure the bloke and his boat, that would have been great. Probably you didn't have any chips to hand, I'm thinking. It might just be possible to clone away the rogue and I'm sure that will improve it. Perhaps darkening the seagulls individually would help too - I know they are a salient part of the story, but it's quite a few milliseconds before a fresh gaze lands back on the boat, which is the tie to the title.
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Re: Coming Home

Postby jillw » Sun Oct 28, 2018 11:32 am

More chips - better photographs. I can do that!
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Re: Coming Home

Postby IanT » Sun Oct 28, 2018 11:39 am

If I might make so bold, even if a crude edit.....
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Re: Coming Home

Postby kimw » Sun Oct 28, 2018 4:11 pm

Think all`s been said and done,
Not sure if I`d agree with Malc on
Try a black and white conversion.
Try a vignette.


Cetainy would never throw chips away :) . Maybe some old bread :)
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Re: Coming Home

Postby PhilC » Sun Oct 28, 2018 6:56 pm

Others have described the image well and I also think this is a good image just a little short. Apologies for repetition, but this is based on the notes I made before the night:

The slowish shutter speed blurs the gulls and is evocative of what can be the mauling and flocking of seagulls when there might be food. I like the idea of observing the scene through a curtain of flapping wings, I can hear the sound! Seagulls are sometimes large and can be very frightening.
The seagulls here seem to be on a similar plane, near to the photographer and flying in the same direction away from the incoming/outgoing fisherman and opposite to his gaze. I wonder where they are flying to? It is a shame several have their heads cropped by the image frame. Maybe a slightly shorter shutter speed could have been used to reduce the extremes of blur?, but also to help with sharpness? – the shutter speed is on the limit for the focal length. If you had time to focus on the hyperfocal distance at f8 or f6.3 would make the image crisper, or alternatively lifting the ISO to 400 (that might then require a little boost in contrast post capture). The dog’s rapport with the fisherman, and looking into the scene is great.

I wouldn’t always encourage seagulls with chips – I saw two people injured outside the Tate at St Ives a few years ago despite the liberal warning signs.

Square seems to be the ‘in’ format – do others like this version? I’ve darkened some bright pebbles and lightened the gulls (they are after all supposed to be white), cloning out a distracting wing. Couldn't resist being inspired by Malcolmb, I’ve done a b/w conversion complete with vignetting.
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Re: Coming Home

Postby gregm » Mon Oct 29, 2018 9:11 am

Jill
Well done for having the courage to put this image in for judging. It is so far from the traditional wisdom on what makes a good image which makes it a MARMITE image. In my opinion it could only be improved by the gull making a non returnable deposit at some suitable spot! I like the image as it is a typical seaside image - the soundtrack may have helped.
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Re: Coming Home

Postby jillw » Tue Oct 30, 2018 7:30 am

Thanks for all the feedback.

This exercise has been a great reminder of the value of the Critique thread. It has also made me realise how under used the Take A Look At This thread has become, I guess because Facebook (which I don't use) has taken it's place.
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Re: Coming Home

Postby TonyMac » Tue Oct 30, 2018 8:47 am

jillw wrote:Thanks for all the feedback.

This exercise has been a great reminder of the value of the Critique thread. It has also made me realise how under used the Take A Look At This thread has become, I guess because Facebook (which I don't use) has taken it's place.
Jill


Quite right Jill we need to push this more, last committee meeting we discussed ways to make the forum a busier place, this is the perfect way to discuss images. We need to encourage people to use it more.
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Re: Coming Home

Postby ronj » Sun Jul 28, 2019 6:02 pm

Nothings happened so far, the forum is practically dead !!!
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